You who were the first boy to hold my hand.
The first lips to touch mine.
The first time I felt an awkward boner which you proceeded to press into my ass and I had a mild panic attack not knowing what was normal at age 15, and being sure that I would get pregnant from this act.
You who made my pubescent dreams of romance come true, and you who crushed them.
Here’s to you, for giving it to me and taking it back.
You who wooed me in the rain with cello symphonies and letters to explain what you really meant was climbing through my window at 2 AM was only worth it for a month.
To you that fought so hard for someone you barely knew but had inexplicable connection to; when it came down to it you wouldn’t even drive hours to see me..how many? Only 2.
You who only ever kissed me once, in public, in secret, 2,000 miles from home and once was enough for you.
You even gave me a diamond at one point.
You who inspired my alcoholic pencil tips and astronomical constellation paragraph shape shift.
And you. You were that thunder that shook my world and left me wonderstruck, soaking in the rain of sprinklers and greener grasses; you who overflowed in me with fiery ocean eyes and left me in a demeanor of ashes.
So, to you, I say cheers because I didn’t know what I was capable of until you all came along.
Cheers to the tears, cheers to the mere aching of my heart, cheers to never listening to my mom because I was SURE you were the one, and cheers to the strength I gave myself over the years.
Who knew I could transform thoughts into writeable, readable, notable, undeniable tenacities that made your inflictions of love survivable.
The fury of love and the comforting warmth of heartbreak was my greatest muse, and I owe that all to you.